The response to my stories is so overwhelming, this page may take a little while to load up properly......
"Well, I think that Gizzard has a deep paranoia about aliens. I mean, I'm an alien, yet I don't go round flying on lawnmowers (flymo - must admit, that was good), or go round cleaning people's carpets. I think there were many flaws in his story, and that we should, perhaps, take him back with us so we can experiment on him, see why he feels the need to create this hysteria about my harmless, fun loving race."
"Wow man, i saw those stories, and i just thought to myself, 'wicked' ya know? Sorted."
"I can't take it! He's too strange! I'm going to blow myself up repeatedly!! Cluck!" ((BANG))
"Well I reckon they're real great, and I'd like to make every copy of Internet Explorer load this homepage up straight away, without any choice for the user whatsoever, but I'm being sued at the moment for things like that, so I'd better not."
"They like, sucked! Stupid words! There were no pictures! What a dumbass."
"I used to be addicted to scaring people away from their curds and whey. But not any more, thanks to those stories, I am now addicted to cheese. i will steal your cheese! I MUST HAVE YOUR CHEEEEEEESE!!"
"The boy is obviously evil. His mind is already twisted enough to warp many fragile minds with just his story telling. I bow down to his almghty heinousness. And that spider's pretty sadistic too."
"I reckon there's some kinda 'between the lines' perversion going on here, you know, with the carrots and his obsession with cheese. Nudge nudge, wink, wink, mums the word!"
"Well I think it just sucks, but then I'm a grouch, so I think that about a lot of things."
"No, no, no, I just don't understand it, no, no, no...... Ook."
"Ooooh hoo hooo hooooo, they got me all excited!"
"Fascinating.... Merv clearly is delusional, with highly irregular behaviour."
"Shut up demon weasle! You nibbler of damp beaver nuts! Acknowledge me as the nippless wonder! Stare deep into the spooky depths of my crotch! I am testicle's, god of rash covered scrotums!"
"Wheeeee, It's so good it makes me want to bounce! Bounce, bounce, bounce, bounce....."
"Nyaaaaaaaaargh! Euuuuuurgh! The stories won't stop! They're everywhere! They're going to kill us all! Your eyeballs look like rodents!
"Don't be silly, I'm a cow, I can't speak English. Mooo. See?"